Perhaps you’ve noticed that there’s something different happening around here.

Such as: Distressed Mullet is all new and re-designed!

We’ve been working on this since May and it is STILL a work in progress. We have migrated the site from Drupal back to WordPress, which means nothing to most of you, but we have 7,000 posts to categorize so that you can find the information you need, and that’s going to take some time. John is currently running on nothing but caffeine, sprouts (he is in Oregon right now, after all), and beer. Be kind to him. And if you see him at the Gorge, proffer chocolate. Preferably dark.

There’s an incredible amount of potential to unlock with this new site and we’re happy to to be back on a platform that will easily support everything you want and need from the Mullet.

For the People Who Paddle

We’re debuting a new tagline. We’re now Distressed Mullet: For the People who Paddle. We paddle just like you do. We buy gear and test it out and have adventures and travel and meet friends.

We’re not corporate.

We’re not a marketing company.

We write about everyone and everything–not just our advertisers.

We’re not big: it’s just John (The Mullet), me (Katie, a.k.a. Cousin Mullet), and dedicated followers and fans and contributors and string and gum and duct tape and hamsters. And John. Did I say John? He started (and, largely, continues) this as a labor of love.

We’re supported by paddle-related businesses large and small who believe in this industry and everything it can bring into our lives.

We’re old and young, fat and skinny, fast and slow, wealthy and broke, but the one thing we all share is that we paddle–with our hands or our paddles–and we’re stoked.

Patience, Grasshopper

We just launched today after months of work by our designers and developers. Jonah Coyote (he has a real last name but I don’t know what it is) and Nathan Bauer from Yellow Cow Designs have really helped us make something great that we can continue to build.

In the meantime, we have a few favors to ask you.

  • If you don’t see your classified or event up there, if you can, re-submit it. We had to hand-enter everything in the directories and we might have missed you. If you have problems, email [email protected] or [email protected]
  • If you’re a contributor, sit tight, we’re adding your author tags so that everyone knows that YOU were the supercalifragilisticexpialidocious scribe behind the lovely prose you crafted.
  • If you run into an issue–registering, submitting, trying to find something, email us. We need to know about these things so we can fix them!
  • Just be patient. We’re doing our best to get everything re-categorized so you can easily find everything from the menus. If it isn’t categorized, you can just use the nifty new search bar and probably find it!

Subscribe to CHUM

If you don’t already get the CHUM newsletter you’re missing out. We have at least three ridiculous things in our newsletter each week and at least three or six useful things.

Share the Love

Share our link! Invite friends! Mullets swim in schools, after all. We’re safer, more menacing, and have more fun in packs!